Day 2: The beginner's guide to will power

   This morning I got up early for a doctor's appt. I had to go see a neurologist for a bump on the noggin a month ago. I'm actually glad for the timing, as it was a good opportunity to get myself figured out a little better. I still have some tests, but for the most part everything seems fine. What was really wonderful about this doctor in particular is he set up an appointment with a family practice doc so that I can address some of the underlying issues that, I'm sure, partially contribute to my fat issue. Depression and insomnia. I can't wait to get a good nights sleep, I can't wait to crawl into bed and not lay awake for 6 hours just so I can sleep for 2, and I can't wait to wake up in the morning and feel like I'm ready to face the day, and just be able to look at my family and be happy. This isn't something that I have wanted to discuss with many people, I've wanted to hide and just try to work through it. I didn't want to be compared to people with similar problems and have people look at me with pity in their eyes because I feel sad. But I have come to realize that the only way I can solve any of this is to be honest and to make sure people know, that way, as I write everyday, I have to follow through and I have to show progress, because I have no interest in telling a story and not having the proof to back it up.
   So, this leads me to the conversation that I had with this wonderful doc this morning. I told him about my plan to make things better for myself. I was totally honest with him, and when he heard about my situation, he was really amazed that it took me this long to address it. Again, I've always felt embarrassed. I told him about the diet and this blog, and he told me that if everyone who started a diet did something like this, and followed throught with it, the success rate for diets could possibly be higher. He told me to tell the MD tomorrow, and get tips from him. This conversation added to my excitement and motivation.
   This leads me to my first real day on the diet. Actually let me tell you about dinner last night. I made my fried chicken and mashed potatoes, and payed attention to how I felt after I ate it. It tasted great, don't get me wrong, and I had that wonderful food feeling, until I was finished, and I was tired and sluggish and irritable. How have I not noticed this before? Well I just really didn't stop eating, I never really let myself have time to put it all together. And again I didn't sleep well. (shocker)
   I woke up at 5:30 this morning, not feeling hungry, but immediately thought about food. Luckily I didn't have enough time to worry about food, I had to get myself and all of the kids ready so I could be out the door on time. By the time the appointment was over I was soooo hungry and I was ready to take Logan down the street to Burger King, but I stopped myself. Instead I went to the grocery store and got lots of fruits and veggies, I got whole grain bread, and non fat yogurt and cottage cheese. When I came home I made myself an egg white sandwich on 1 piece of dry toast, I had 1 whole kiwi, and a cup of strawberry greek yogurt.  Hey, here's a fun fact, I just stuffed my face with Atkins version of Satan, but the calorie count was about 340, which for me.... huuuuuge difference. And here is another fun fact, today is National Chocolate Day... guess I won't be celebrating this year! Ha ha! Based on that breakfast, I actually feel energized. I don't feel hungry, and because of that it's time to exercise! I got a couple of really great hints lastnight, the first is: If it comes in a package, don't eat it. That is really great advice and easy to remember. the second was: You need to move your butt twice as much as you move your mouth. Fantastic! Now I just need to talk a little less...
   I have a plan for dinner, but I don't want to discuss that until I have the chance to see if it will really work, if it does, it has the potential to be really incredible, and I will post pics and a recipe tomorrow. Now it is time for me to run and get to shakin my butt, as it is I'm pretty sure I owe myself 62 years of butt shaking!